[Varian knew settling into a new world wouldn't be an easy experience, he wasn't anywhere near that naive, but he didn't expect it to be as monumentally difficult as this has been. A solid mixture of having to deal with suddenly having magic and the paranoia of actually hurting someone with that and the general coldblood anxiety of the month has made the settling in experience awful. He's only catching snatches of sleep which while not unusual for him is really not helped by the fact when he's awake he feels like every nerve ending is on fire. Maybe they are. Maybe everything is just fire right now. That stands to reason.
Despite the fact everything is fire, he has been trying to sleep. Or rather, he's laid down in bed and stared at the ceiling while willing his brain to go to sleep. Bur tragically as much as he tells himself to go to sleep right now it's not really working, so his mind just starts to wander. Little snippets of everything and anything come floating in his head- mostly science stuff, also some garbled nonsense that makes perfect sense to him at the time. He remembers old conversations, runs through them in his head like little pantomimes.
Fern said something once about crashing Finn's birthday party and trying to murder him. Which wasn't anything new, but something about that particular conversation is picking at is mind. Something about telling Finn he could attack him if he could land the same blow-
Varian sits upright, suddenly an old story he remembers reading coming surging into his mind. This is definitely not an important thing and maybe if his mind wasn't running on every cylinder all at once he might have left this until the morning, just left Fern sleeping peacefully next to him and just went on with his anxiety-fueled not-sleeping. But it's not. That is not the reality they are living in.
So that's how Fern gets aggressively shaken at 3 in the morning like this is the most drastic piece of information in the universe.]
Fern! Fern, Fern, wake up! Did you know you did an Arthurian Legend?
[There are probably a thousand better ways to vocalise that thought, but this is what he's got. ]
[Settling into an entirely new world has, strangely enough, been a bit easier for Fern. He still feels uncomfortably suspicious about it all, for sure, but so far everything seems legitimate. Not fake, not a hallucination, not a trap by Deerington. He isn't going to discount the possibility of the last one, of course, and occasionally his head has been feeling weird as hell, but all in all he's been adjusting okay.
Better than Varian, at least. His concern for his boyfriend hasn't really abated, not since the beach, but he's doing his best and hoping that having friends like Luca and Luz staying in the house will help. Maybe he just needs some time? That's what Fern is hoping.
At any rate, he's been a bit more firm about making sure Varian sleeps regularly. Tonight he's fallen asleep rather quickly, so when Varian decides this is the most important piece of information ever he's still fast asleep. He's still asleep when he's being shaken awake, and luckily this time he doesn't startle awake and try to stab anything in his immediate vicinity. He just curls up a little bit more, wanting to go back to sleep, groaning.]
Bwuuuuh? [What is going on, is he dreaming, he's so, so tired.]
[Maul had watched Yuri's video, knowing exactly what people were going to think when they saw it. But it still hurt to see Fern immediately jump to the conclusion he had. He thought back to what Varian had told him at the beginning of the month, that he needed to apologize and fix things before they were irreparably broken forever.
So here he wa, trying to do just that. He'd instructed Venge to cloak themselves in the shadows with the Force and hide off to the side. If Fern tried to attack him, he'd have the Maalraas pin him down instead. He waited on the roof until he saw Fern come out of the house by himself. Then he jumped down right in front of the grass boy. Really, Maul needed to work on his entrance and sense of timing, given how he didn't realized that this could be misconstrued as something else.]
[This is, quite possibly, the worst way to start out an apology ever. Fern isn't suspecting anything if he heads out of the house, though he is glancing around warily thanks to some darkblood-induced monthly paranoia.
So when Maul jumps down right in front of him out of nowhere, he acts appropriately: yelping and stumbling backwards, and forming a grass sword in one hand as thorns shoot up along his arms. It's very much an oh shit, the guy who nearly killed me kind of reaction, a mixture of shock and anger and fear. That whirl of emotions is causing a surprising burst of black smoke to form in front of him - his orchid mantis Omen, Blodeuwedd.
Except she isn't her usual size, that of a small bird. Nope, she's about the size of a horse right now, and looking a great deal spinier, with what looks like tree branches growing out of her back. She hisses threateningly at Maul, positioning herself protectively in front of Fern.]
A list of Coronan/German words largely important to Fern Mertens AKA what I'm actually hearing when you talk to me (as promised)
Guten morgen - Good morning Gute nacht - Good night Hallo - Hello Auf wiedersehen - Goodbye Schwert - Sword Messer - Knife Axt - Axe Kämpfen - Fight Schlacht - Battle Waffen - Weapons Ritter - Knight Held - Hero Farn - Fern Dornen - Thorn Blume - Flower Wurzeln - Roots Gras - Grass Feuerwolf - Firewolf Hund - Dog Gottesanbeterin - Mantis Waschbär - Raccoon Wissenschaft - Science Mathematisch - Mathematical Torte - Cake Kaffee -Coffee Hackbraten - Meatloaf Schatz - Treasure Verliese - Dungeon Bester Freund - Best Friend Freund - Boyfriend is literally the same as 'male friend' - we don't really have a distinguished way of saying it, it gets confusing. You can sometimes add "mein" in front of it because that's a possessive buuuuut it can also be read as "my male friend"- Kurt probably pulled that one on you a lot. Just don't think about it too hard. Niedlich - Cute Gutaussehend - Handsome Schmusen - Cuddle Kuss - Kiss Ich liebe dich - I love you
[ There's a large image attachment: a detailed topographic map of Trench overlaid with the measurements of relevant elements K scanned for, noted by percentage. For Fern's convenience, K has also gone over the map and marked any of the most promising areas by hand. Unfortunately, as expected, those aren't exactly plentiful. It's a very good thing others have been able to help with the plant-food problem. ]
My scanners also detected something... interesting? In the soil. I'm compiling that data now. Maybe you can help make more sense of it.
[Readouts? Fern has no idea what K is talking about. He opens the attachment, and ohhh boy, this is way more than Fern can understand. He's going to have to show this to Varian, he can't make heads or tails of it.]
i uh wow i can try no guarantees though, this looks like science junk if i can't help Varian might be able to
I was talking to Varian about something recently, and he said there was something that you might be able to have some advice and experience with for... a thing I've been thinking about, if you don't mind talking about it.
[ Fern's Omni goes off at some ridiculous hour of the morning, and when answered lights up with a video message from Orpheus. He's sitting in a dark room, lit solely from below by a faint, orange-gold pulsating light. The air around him shimmers slightly, like it does above metal or concrete on a hot day, but if it's actually anywhere near that hot where he is, he doesn't seem to notice. His hands are on his guitar, and as soon as Fern picks up, he begins to play a frantic, layered melody, his eyes aglow. ]
There's an eruption coming There's a shadow overhead The volcano's heart is crumbling But you won't leave him for dead
Where the stone that grounds him rises Where the stalwart ravens fly What the Prince of Gulls advises Is what you, Green Knight, apply
You'll steel your heart against the cold Steel your mind against the dread Fearing not the marble stronghold Nor the ravens overhead
By the love that's shared between you By sword and claw you'll live or die Fire and amber start to creep through But you know you have to try
There's an eruption coming There's ashes in the air The beast that is becoming Bears the spark of his despair
[Oh hey, Orpheus! The message wakes Fern up, he's trying to sleep in a little and get up with the very late sunrise, and when he rolls over to check his Omni he assumes this is some harmless little text. No big deal.
He is so very wrong. And very confused. It's a beautiful song, which isn't surprising because Orpheus, but that shimmering screams magic to him, and he isn't totally sure what's going on. It's concerning, honestly.
[Early Christmas morning wrapped up in a towel and nuzzled in a basket with sprigs of evergreen pines and dried orange slices will be a mixed berry pie.
Attached is a card with elegant writing:]
Merry Christmas, Fern! I hope you stay warm and safe! Love, Snow White
[That dagger is the coolest thing ever. Fern will totally be hiding that in his boot, since he has to wear boots right now, and it going to use it in his next monster fight!]
[Maul's fiendish delight in the holiday means he's once again broken into people's houses and used all the stealth he possesses to leave those he likes a gift or two. Sometimes, he even goes right down the chimney like a demented version of Santa Claus. Given how things turned out last year at the Disaster House, he just leaves them all on the porch instead. He leaves for Fern a green dagger and since he is clearly still evil, a bag of fertilizer. He also leaves him a short note.]
Merry Christmas to you Fern. I hope you will enjoy these.
[Lance just woke up from the vision of his fucking life and he knows only like… two things for certain. Okay, maybe three things? He scribbled what he could down and immediately called Fern and Varian. His hair is a bit of a mess, there's bags under his eyes and there's a smudge of blue ink on his cheek as well as pale glowing blood smeared near his nose and mouth.]
Dude. Fern, I've got one hell of a message for you from the powers that be. Or the future. Or the universe. Just—- from whatever gives palebloods stupid prophecies. Is Varian with you?
[As he's talking he's gesticulating with his hands a bit and Fern may notice there's a guitar in one hand a bunch of papers in the other.]
[This definitely isn't a call Fern is expecting. Lance looks like he needs a nap - he looks like he needs three naps, and he's more worried about that than some supposed vision.]
Uh, yeah, lemmie grab him. You okay, okay?
[He's at home, so he's going to go head down to the basement to Varian's lab, poking his head in.]
[After absolutely going the fuck off on Maul, Varian's going to head off in search of his boyfriend. Which is, at least, an easier task to do with the bond. As soon as he finds him, he's getting pulled into a hug.]
[He appreciates it. Really, he does. He's just getting ready to book it out to Ache via lamp friends, to go take his anger and frustration out on some monsters.
But a hug is good, too. As soon as he's pulled into it Fern stops, then practically collapses into it, sniffling and clinging back.]
[Oh wow, this is not a message Fern expected to get. He doesn't see it until he's spoken with Varian and calmed down a little - he's still angry and upset, but not about to start smashing things anymore. He still needs to get out to Ache and get these feelings out in a healthy way though, so he responds as he walks.
Ezra seemed nice but he's right, they don't know each other very well, so he had no clue he knew Maul back home and definitely had no clue he was let down by him. But he isn't surprised, because that's just what Maul does to people.]
geez dude i'm sorry i don't know why i give that jerk the time of day, all he does is bring everyone else around him down or hurt them i've done a lot of bad stuff in my life but i'm not him and i never wanna be like him
( What good is a stepbrother who's possessed by a treasure-conjuring demon if he doesn't conjure some cool treasure for your birthday?
Peter's recently been able to intentionally conjure things with Paimon. It takes a great deal of effort and energy and it's not something he can do often, but for Fern's birthday, he's definitely going to.
So delivered to Fern's home that afternoon (thanks to Susurrus) will be a small green velvet bag containing a medieval ring made of solid gold, with an enamel skull in the center. The Latin phrase memento mori is also inscribed around the skull — macabre, but definitely telling of the era.
When he inevitably chats to Fern later on, he'll explain that he's not too brushed up on history, but he'd wanted to whip up something "cool and medieval" for Fern, so he and Paimon conjured a treasure that came from the late Middle Ages of Peter's world. If Fern doesn't want to actually wear it as a ring (it's pretty heavy), it could definitely just be a decorative item, too. Happy Birthday, dude! )
[Oh. Oh wow. Fern is totally into the whole skull theme of the ring - it honestly looks like treasure he'd loot from some dungeon in Ooo, so he's absolutely thrilled to get it. It's doubly cool that Peter and Paimon were able to conjure it, which in Fern's mind makes it probably the coolest ring he's ever gotten. Next time they talk he's telling Peter as much. What an excellent gift!!]
[Fern was her knight. And while Fern had many many swords, she was pretty sure that he didn't have a katana (or who knew, maybe he didm considering this was Fern and he had an obscenely large collection). But either way, he was HER knight.
So, for Christmas he had gotten the pink dagger with flowers, and, keeping with tradition, a pink bladed katana.
Attached is a birthday card with her usual bunny doodle:]
Happy birthday, Fern!
If you've never used a katana before let me know and we can find someone who has. It's different than the swords you might be used to!
[Fern will never, ever turn down another sword. He loves each and every sword in his collection and always will, no matter how many he has. So he's over the moon when when he gets her present. It's awesome and pink and now this means he can dual wield with both the dagger and this new katana. How cool is that??
Fern will be sending a message back to her, excited as heck, thanking her for the gift. Included is going to be a video of him using the katana on a training dummy. He's got a decent handle on how to use it, since he's used to wielding swords, and he's exciting to work on his katana skills.]
[Reaper was tired. That was unfortunately the downside of losing all of his mass regeneration that he had acquired with the blood he had consumed. It was gone now, stripped away along with the corruption that had maintained him with a manic energy.
He had spent a lot of time away from the house at the end, consumed by addiction that still chewed at him. Right now, he was too tired for anything of the sort. However, he had made it home, to his room. It wasn't supposed to be a feat yet it felt like it.]
I'm going to have to lean on you to put some food together tonight. I expect Luz and Rapunzel have been taken care of it while I've been out. [He sounded quiet, exhausted.]
Me? [He isn't that much of a cook, though Manabu's lessons have certainly been helping, and Luz and Rapunzel are indeed incredibly competent when it comes to mealtimes.] Why? Um, what's going on?
[This has to be about that message that was posted to the network.]
Action; Early Sept- Just defiling your fresh new inbox
Despite the fact everything is fire, he has been trying to sleep. Or rather, he's laid down in bed and stared at the ceiling while willing his brain to go to sleep. Bur tragically as much as he tells himself to go to sleep right now it's not really working, so his mind just starts to wander. Little snippets of everything and anything come floating in his head- mostly science stuff, also some garbled nonsense that makes perfect sense to him at the time. He remembers old conversations, runs through them in his head like little pantomimes.
Fern said something once about crashing Finn's birthday party and trying to murder him. Which wasn't anything new, but something about that particular conversation is picking at is mind. Something about telling Finn he could attack him if he could land the same blow-
Varian sits upright, suddenly an old story he remembers reading coming surging into his mind. This is definitely not an important thing and maybe if his mind wasn't running on every cylinder all at once he might have left this until the morning, just left Fern sleeping peacefully next to him and just went on with his anxiety-fueled not-sleeping. But it's not. That is not the reality they are living in.
So that's how Fern gets aggressively shaken at 3 in the morning like this is the most drastic piece of information in the universe.]
Fern! Fern, Fern, wake up! Did you know you did an Arthurian Legend?
[There are probably a thousand better ways to vocalise that thought, but this is what he's got. ]
hahaha yesssssssss
Better than Varian, at least. His concern for his boyfriend hasn't really abated, not since the beach, but he's doing his best and hoping that having friends like Luca and Luz staying in the house will help. Maybe he just needs some time? That's what Fern is hoping.
At any rate, he's been a bit more firm about making sure Varian sleeps regularly. Tonight he's fallen asleep rather quickly, so when Varian decides this is the most important piece of information ever he's still fast asleep. He's still asleep when he's being shaken awake, and luckily this time he doesn't startle awake and try to stab anything in his immediate vicinity. He just curls up a little bit more, wanting to go back to sleep, groaning.]
Bwuuuuh? [What is going on, is he dreaming, he's so, so tired.]
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text; un: yeswestan
HEY KID YOU GOT A MINUTE???
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sure dude what's up
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text -> action
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Action
So here he wa, trying to do just that. He'd instructed Venge to cloak themselves in the shadows with the Force and hide off to the side. If Fern tried to attack him, he'd have the Maalraas pin him down instead. He waited on the roof until he saw Fern come out of the house by himself. Then he jumped down right in front of the grass boy. Really, Maul needed to work on his entrance and sense of timing, given how he didn't realized that this could be misconstrued as something else.]
We need to talk.
[He said in his usual whisper-soft voice.]
Re: Action
So when Maul jumps down right in front of him out of nowhere, he acts appropriately: yelping and stumbling backwards, and forming a grass sword in one hand as thorns shoot up along his arms. It's very much an oh shit, the guy who nearly killed me kind of reaction, a mixture of shock and anger and fear. That whirl of emotions is causing a surprising burst of black smoke to form in front of him - his orchid mantis Omen, Blodeuwedd.
Except she isn't her usual size, that of a small bird. Nope, she's about the size of a horse right now, and looking a great deal spinier, with what looks like tree branches growing out of her back. She hisses threateningly at Maul, positioning herself protectively in front of Fern.]
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un: trienemybest; text
A list of Coronan/German words largely important to Fern Mertens AKA what I'm actually hearing when you talk to me (as promised)
Guten morgen - Good morning
Gute nacht - Good night
Hallo - Hello
Auf wiedersehen - Goodbye
Schwert - Sword
Messer - Knife
Axt - Axe
Kämpfen - Fight
Schlacht - Battle
Waffen - Weapons
Ritter - Knight
Held - Hero
Farn - Fern
Dornen - Thorn
Blume - Flower
Wurzeln - Roots
Gras - Grass
Feuerwolf - Firewolf
Hund - Dog
Gottesanbeterin - Mantis
Waschbär - Raccoon
Wissenschaft - Science
Mathematisch - Mathematical
Torte - Cake
Kaffee -Coffee
Hackbraten - Meatloaf
Schatz - Treasure
Verliese - Dungeon
Bester Freund - Best Friend
Freund - Boyfriend is literally the same as 'male friend' - we don't really have a distinguished way of saying it, it gets confusing. You can sometimes add "mein" in front of it because that's a possessive buuuuut it can also be read as "my male friend"- Kurt probably pulled that one on you a lot. Just don't think about it too hard.
Niedlich - Cute
Gutaussehend - Handsome
Schmusen - Cuddle
Kuss - Kiss
Ich liebe dich - I love you
1/2
i got no idea how to pronounce like all of these
gottesanbeterin, that's a mouthful!
yeah Kurt called me that sometimes
that must have been insanely confusing for you when i first told you about my feelings
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text | un: K (follow up to Fern's dirt-y network post)
[ There's a large image attachment: a detailed topographic map of Trench overlaid with the measurements of relevant elements K scanned for, noted by percentage. For Fern's convenience, K has also gone over the map and marked any of the most promising areas by hand. Unfortunately, as expected, those aren't exactly plentiful. It's a very good thing others have been able to help with the plant-food problem. ]
My scanners also detected something... interesting? In the soil. I'm compiling that data now. Maybe you can help make more sense of it.
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i uh
wow
i can try
no guarantees though, this looks like science junk
if i can't help Varian might be able to
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un: agentmothman | text
I was talking to Varian about something recently, and he said there was something that you might be able to have some advice and experience with for... a thing I've been thinking about, if you don't mind talking about it.
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uh sure not going to guarantee anything because i'm pretty bad with the advice-giving but i can try my best
what do you need help with?
[This sounds vaguely ominous, though Fern isn't totally sure why. It's probably just help with using a sword or something.]
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video | un: lyreplayer | forward-dated to whenever's most convenient
There's an eruption coming
There's a shadow overhead
The volcano's heart is crumbling
But you won't leave him for dead
Where the stone that grounds him rises
Where the stalwart ravens fly
What the Prince of Gulls advises
Is what you, Green Knight, apply
You'll steel your heart against the cold
Steel your mind against the dread
Fearing not the marble stronghold
Nor the ravens overhead
By the love that's shared between you
By sword and claw you'll live or die
Fire and amber start to creep through
But you know you have to try
There's an eruption coming
There's ashes in the air
The beast that is becoming
Bears the spark of his despair
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He is so very wrong. And very confused. It's a beautiful song, which isn't surprising because Orpheus, but that shimmering screams magic to him, and he isn't totally sure what's going on. It's concerning, honestly.
Once Orpheus is finished he speaks up.]
Um, Orpheus, dude, you okay? What was that about?
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Christmas Delivery
Attached is a card with elegant writing:]
Merry Christmas, Fern!
I hope you stay warm and safe!
Love,
Snow White
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Christmas Delivery
Attached is a note with a little rabbit doodle:]
Happy Holidays!
Love,
Usagi
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Action; Backdated to Christmas
Merry Christmas to you Fern. I hope you will enjoy these.
Action; Backdated to Christmas
The fertilizer is going into Varian's greenhouse because that gift is hideously embarrassing. Thanks, Maul.]
video | un: sharpshooter (New Year's Eve)
Dude. Fern, I've got one hell of a message for you from the powers that be. Or the future. Or the universe. Just—- from whatever gives palebloods stupid prophecies. Is Varian with you?
[As he's talking he's gesticulating with his hands a bit and Fern may notice there's a guitar in one hand a bunch of papers in the other.]
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Uh, yeah, lemmie grab him. You okay, okay?
[He's at home, so he's going to go head down to the basement to Varian's lab, poking his head in.]
Hey, you got a second? We got a call.
[He holds his Omini up, waggling it.]
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voice; un: quibbler
I'm just going to be quite honest and come out with it. I'm one of the three who cursed Maul.
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You did?? Seriously?? What the flip?!
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text; un: shiro
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we're
what?
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1/3
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Action, time for sqouze
I'm sorry he spoke to you like that.
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But a hug is good, too. As soon as he's pulled into it Fern stops, then practically collapses into it, sniffling and clinging back.]
I'm not like him! He's wrong!
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Text; un: lothrat
Hey, this is Ezra. I know don't know you very well yet. But I do know Maul, from back home. A future version, anyway.
I know what it's like to feel horribly let down by him. So if you want to talk, I'm here.
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Ezra seemed nice but he's right, they don't know each other very well, so he had no clue he knew Maul back home and definitely had no clue he was let down by him. But he isn't surprised, because that's just what Maul does to people.]
geez dude i'm sorry
i don't know why i give that jerk the time of day, all he does is bring everyone else around him down or hurt them
i've done a lot of bad stuff in my life but i'm not him and i never wanna be like him
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text | un: younghuman
My name is Paul Atreides. You may have heard of me. A mutual avian acquaintance told me that you're someone to talk to about weapon-crafting.
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sure have, dude!
yeah i can make weapons
you need a knife or something?
you don't mind weird plant weapons do you, that's sort of my specialty
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birthday delivery!
Peter's recently been able to intentionally conjure things with Paimon. It takes a great deal of effort and energy and it's not something he can do often, but for Fern's birthday, he's definitely going to.
So delivered to Fern's home that afternoon (thanks to Susurrus) will be a small green velvet bag containing a medieval ring made of solid gold, with an enamel skull in the center. The Latin phrase memento mori is also inscribed around the skull — macabre, but definitely telling of the era.
When he inevitably chats to Fern later on, he'll explain that he's not too brushed up on history, but he'd wanted to whip up something "cool and medieval" for Fern, so he and Paimon conjured a treasure that came from the late Middle Ages of Peter's world. If Fern doesn't want to actually wear it as a ring (it's pretty heavy), it could definitely just be a decorative item, too. Happy Birthday, dude! )
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Birthday Delivery!
So, for Christmas he had gotten the pink dagger with flowers, and, keeping with tradition, a pink bladed katana.
Attached is a birthday card with her usual bunny doodle:]
Happy birthday, Fern!
If you've never used a katana before let me know and we can find someone who has. It's different than the swords you might be used to!
Love,
Usagi
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Fern will be sending a message back to her, excited as heck, thanking her for the gift. Included is going to be a video of him using the katana on a training dummy. He's got a decent handle on how to use it, since he's used to wielding swords, and he's exciting to work on his katana skills.]
Voice; un: Reaper - April 19
He had spent a lot of time away from the house at the end, consumed by addiction that still chewed at him. Right now, he was too tired for anything of the sort. However, he had made it home, to his room. It wasn't supposed to be a feat yet it felt like it.]
I'm going to have to lean on you to put some food together tonight. I expect Luz and Rapunzel have been taken care of it while I've been out. [He sounded quiet, exhausted.]
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Me? [He isn't that much of a cook, though Manabu's lessons have certainly been helping, and Luz and Rapunzel are indeed incredibly competent when it comes to mealtimes.] Why? Um, what's going on?
[This has to be about that message that was posted to the network.]
Are you okay?
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